THOSE days….

Warning: Content may be too gross for anyone who isn’t a mom or doesn’t have animals. Also if you have a weak stomach….

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Today is one of those days….or should I say the last 15 hours so far. You all know what I’m talking about. If it can go wrong, it will. In the last several hours my PPP tolerance level has been tested. What is PPP you say? Pee, Poop, and Puke… If it’s a bodily fluid, there’s a good chance I’ve been cleaning it up since 7 pm last night. It all started with Ev getting a haircut and looking green (and clutching his stomach) in the middle of the hair flying. Needless to say I didn’t have the foresight to grab anything to catch his excorcist like spew and ended up mopping the ENTIRE floor. And just in case you were wondering, as soon as things started getting western, my husband ran. Not kidding, he ran from the room. And I really count it as a favor as I didn’t want to be cleaning up after him as well.

Lucky for me the top end only erupted a couple more times, but unluckily for me, the bottom end decided it needed to catch up. Yeah, Ev has gone through no less than 4 pairs of underwear in the last 2 hours… My washing machine is working overtime today. And if that wasn’t enough, apparently I was late letting my dogs out (ya know, the whole not wanting to leave any of that yucky stuff laying around to be cleaned up later, somehow throwing a towel over it and coming back wasn’t gonna fly) and my dearest little Kodi couldn’t hold it. That’s where the third P comes in. Good times, good times…. I’m thinking I rewrite yesterday’s blog with today’s intinerary. Clean poop off of this, go throw clothes in washer, wipe up puke off of toilet seat and child, go throw away wipe, come back to clean up dog crate, spot treat carpet, mop linoleum, start all over….

Those days

Anybody got a bottle of this I can have? Looking for my can of lysol when I finish typing this 🙂 Especially since tomorrow is Halloween and I DO NOT want to be this mom…

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Of course it’s not a birthday party or the flu, but you get the picture. And who wants to tell their kid they don’t get to go trick or treating.

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What did I come in here for?

Ok, going to the laundry room to shut off the light… Step through the doorway and realize I need to switch the laundry from the washer to the dryer. Finish doing that and remember I needed to grab something out of the freezer that sits directly across from the washer and dryer. Clean off the freezer, piling the stuff on the washer, dig down to the bottom of the freezer finally finding what I need, put all frozen food back in the freezer, then random junk we can’t live without back on the freezer so I can switch more laundry later. Oh, wait, here’s a box of trash that needs to go out. Take that to the dumpster, come back in, and see a bag of trash I forgot to take to the dumpster with me. Go back outside, pick up a gum wrapper that must’ve blown out of someone’s vehicle, throw it in the trash with the forgotten trash bag. Come back in the house. There’s a bowl on the coffee table that needs to go to the kitchen. Take it to the kitchen and notice the counter needs wiped off. Open the kitchen cabinets to get out clorox wipes and remember I never started the dishwasher. Get the dishwashing detergent out, fill up the dishwasher, turn the knob and get it going. Get the clorox wipes out, clean off counter and decide to sweep floor since somehow the crumbs from the counter ended up on the floor. Sweep and mop the floor. Sit down to check Facebook and see I haven’t sent info and invoice to client. Open email to send said info and invoice and see I have a comment on my blog. Oh yeah, write blog today, but after I send client info and invoice. Open up blog, have no idea what to write, start playing with my hair and realize I haven’t brushed it yet today. Get up, go brush hair, get dog hair on socks from bathroom floor. Drag vacuum out and suck up all the dog hair. And clean toilet since I’m in the bathroom already. Go back, work on blog. Need to fold the laundry that’s on the loveseat so I don’t build up another mountain. Fold a few of Ev’s clothes, go put them away. Find dirty clothes in the boys room, take them to the laundry room. The light is still on….

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The many issues with feeding a family

Ok, so the only real issue I have is what the $#%&#$%!@ to fix….. Seriously, why is it so hard to decide?? Probably because I wait until the last minute a lot of the time. But honestly, it usually works out that if I plan ahead, something comes up and we don’t eat at home for 3 days and I forget how long the chicken I had defrosting has been in the fridge :-p

And then the decision of, do we eat healthy or not comes into play. Of course I try to make most things a ‘little’ healthier by replacing white rice with brown, processed breads and pastas with whole wheat or veggie, and adding at least one (sometimes two) veggies. But there’s only so much you can do to ‘healthify’ ramen noodles and hot dogs (yes, sometimes ya just gotta throw in the towel and toss some cheap crappy food on the stove or in the microwave).

Tonight we are having meatloaf (leftover from what I cooked for Mark to eat while I was at my sister’s), broccoli cheese soup, and hot dog buns made into garlic bread (hey, they are terrible when you have to freeze them and if someone can actually buy buns without having 3 packages left over, I need your secret). It’ll be yummy and my hubby won’t complain (he knows better 😉 )but can’t be mistaken for gourmet!

Here’s what I’m thinking about for supper tomorrow

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It’s cornbread in the waffle maker with chili on top. Oh, and this will be my dinner…

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And so it begins…

First I wanna apologize because I didn’t write yesterday…I’d like to say I was sleeping all day, but I was lucky enough to be a volunteer in my youngest sons Pre-k class!

Teaching

 

 

Just a few more pics of my little cutie patootie who was very happy to have me in his class. Can’t wait for next week!!

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Zzzzzz…..

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I took a self portrait this morning… I don’t remember having such long ears and big teeth, but without a doubt this is what I looked like when I finally dragged my butt out of bed. I’m tired… How do we have days like this? I say we because I’m hoping I’m not the only one who feels like I constantly work but always wonder what I get done. I don’t have proof of anything I accomplish sometimes because it all gets covered in dirt, dog hair, pee, leftovers, and various other things that don’t belong on clean areas. And I feel guilty a lot for being tired. I know there are people who work 12 hour shifts and save lives and are up from 5 am until midnight and don’t have days off and do things that make a difference to thousands of people around the world. But I do laundry and dishes and clean up pee at the base of the toilet.

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I think we should have holidays dedicated to just curling up in a blanket and reading a book while drinking coffee (tea or hot cocoa work too 🙂 ). There should also be pumpkin bread, chicken noodle soup, and a Disney movie playing in the background. A fireplace blazing with mountains covered in snow just outside the picturesque window (that someone else cleans the nose and finger prints off of) finish the ideal perfectly.

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I would like to put in an order for a nap today, preferably 4 hours long, starting now. But I’ll have to put that order on hold because all the stuff I need to take care of is beckoning. I really want to geniusly wrap this up, but I don’t have the brain matter functioning right now to do it :-p

Code Brown… I mean Blue

What is a panic attack? Cause I think I have them… ;-p I know we covered my social inadequacies in a previous post, but I think we need a recap.

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Did anyone else do some sort of color personality test in high school? I don’t remember ANYTHING about it other than I was a blue.
http://www.theslideprojector.com/pdffiles/learnertypes.pdf

Blues don’t like conflict and I have found myself in conflict twice today! Now, bear in mind, what makes me nervous are things that everday normal people think nothing of. When I feel like I have to defend myself or something I believe in, I begin to have an anxiety attack (or at least that’s what I like to call it :-p). My face starts getting hot, my stomach begins to turn, and I feel like I’ve had a whole stinking pot of coffee! It actually takes me some time to come down off this feeling. Boy, I bet some of you are really wondering how I function normally at all in any kind of public situation! I would say that is probably why all my interactions are brought to you by keyboard 🙂

 

Anyways, I guess my issues aren’t too terribly bad, I mean, this isn’t something any of us have to worry about…

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I do have some stomach problems sometimes, but thankfully no code browns yet. So now, hopefully back to regular programming and less of my frighteningly overabundance of information most of you could care less about :-p

Skeletons in the Closet

Duhn, duhn, duhn….. Yes, I have a secret to reveal (no I’m not a superhero, where on earth would you get a crazy idea like that? 😉 )…. What is it? I am a fashion junky (junkie?). I LOVE all things fashion and would own a wardrobe any celebrity would envy if it were practical (ya know, the whole money thing, plus where to wear it!). I’m sure this comes as a complete surprise to most of you since I only own one pair of dress pants and a pair of $5 heels from Rue 21. But it’s true…. I’ve seen every single episode of America’s Next Top Model at least once, some of them probably a dozen times (Yes, yes, yes, I know, that’s probably the lamest show I could watch as far as fashion goes, but I have limited time and when I can throw in drama, fashion, and modeling into one hour, I’m there!).

Here are some looks I’ve drooled over….

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And honestly, it’s probably not the money necessarily, cause I have a friend I know would help me out with finding bargains if I asked her. She is going to be a stylist librarian when she grows up and I will be her first customer 😉 But it’s more like having a PLACE to wear these looks. I’m fairly certain people would think they are paying me entirely too much to train their dog if I show up in the peacock number… But maybe one of these days my Cinderella moments will come true. 🙂

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Oh, and for your reading pleasure….. The ONLY blog I follow religiously because she incorporates fashion, humor, and overshares. http://dressesforjulie.wordpress.com/  (Still working on the cute and professional version of a link, be patient 😉 )

What do you do all day?

Ok, I know there was a recent blog by Matt Walsh referencing stay-at-home mom’s and what we do all day (I would link to it if I wasn’t too lazy to figure that out right now, come on, it’s almost 11 pm and I’d like to get this done before tomorrow 😉 ) and for me the title of my blog says it all. I know you’ve all been waiting for me to actually write something that had to do with my daily dealings with dirt and dog hair, so no more biting fingernails and let out that breath you’ve been holding for so long, here goes!

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This handy-dandy pie chart is only partially right, but again, like I said before, it’s late and I am using resources that take the least amount of effort. The ‘on dog’ portion is mostly right, but the ‘on floor’ should definitely be modified. Here are the categories I would recommend… 20% on floor, 10% in crate, 10% in shoes, 10% on clothing, 10% on the bottom of my feet when I get out of the shower (ewww!!) 10% on my freshly shaven leg when the dog decides he needs to bump into me after same shower, 10% in vacuum, which leaves 20% for on the dog. So where does that leave me but with the dog (ok, so it’s really 4 dogs in the house) leaving 70% of it’s hair for me to clean up. So, 4 times 70% means I am cleaning up 280% dog hair…. didn’t know you were getting a math lesson, did ya? I could literally be making sweaters or donating to clumps of love (isn’t that the doggy version?). I’m NOT kidding you, my vacuum is probably about to go on strike especially since it started making some awful noises the other day. Does Bissell have unions?

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The dirt I deal with isn’t just from my kids (no, this isn’t one of my boys, it’s just another random pic from Pinterest, what did I tell you? L-A-Z-Y…. by the way, don’t search for ‘dirty boy’ on Pinterest, yikes!!) it’s also from the dogs, but at least the dogs keep it somewhat contained to their crates. The boys on the other hand (all three actually) are a mess! If they aren’t dragging sticks and rocks in the house, they are bringing in bugs, leaves, and large quantities of dirt. I am so blessed to have brown carpet…. I do have to say that I’m at least thankful this particular situation hasn’t happened….yet….

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So for now, I’m off to bed with visions of dirt and dog hair dancing in my head…

P.S. I apologize for this being so disorganized… I usually take the time to edit so that it at least all runs together smoothly and makes a bit of sense. But maybe this will give you some insight into my brain activity on a regular basis, squirrel….. (if you don’t get it, watch the movie Up)

Husband 101

Ok, so that title is a load of bull, I’m not going to teach anything about husbands or even being married. I just wanna brag on mine 😉

Right now he is cleaning up our boys at the other end of the house (this is quite the job, as I’ve done it a few times myself) and I hear, “You have glitter in your hair, why do you have glitter in your hair? What are you, a princess?” I just smile and giggle, because somehow it reminds me of how blessed I am to not only have a husband who cares about us, but one who isn’t afraid to jump in and do the little things.

Love

Today I got to spend all day with him and those are my favorite. He went grocery shopping with me and even took me to buy new jeans. How many men can brag about sitting in a store while their wife tries on pair after pair after pair… Seriously, even I was starting to annoy myself :-p But he was perfectly wonderful and told me what he liked and what he didn’t. He’s always my go to on what I should wear. He has a way of being honest about things that isn’t rude, but helps me to know when I look like a goober.

I honestly feel like I can say that I have the best husband in the whole wide world and the rest of you ladies can go ahead and be jealous, but that always starts the comparing and I don’t want to be the cause for any riots. If your husband blesses you, go give him a kiss and a hug when you get done reading this, then tell him I said, “You’re welcome.” I could go on for days about all the ways Mark blesses me, but I’ll leave it at that for now 😉

 

Give it up

Before I get into this post, I have to say that every other time I’ve written something, it saves as I go. All the stuff that is just silly and not important has never been lost. I feel like today it MUST be important that I get this out there, because this one disappeared after I finished the whole thing. All of it but the first paragraph gone…and if you know me, you know how much I HATE having to re-write something after I’ve done all the editing. But, I’m guessing someone needs it, so here goes 🙂

****There are days I have tons of things I could write about and there are days I feel a certain topic is laid on my heart. Today that topic is forgiveness. It’s such an interesting word because, to most, forgiveness is giving a ‘free pass’ or telling someone that what they did was ok, when it reality, that’s not it at all.

First, a little history into why this subject is an important one for me. Negativity affects me in a way that changes who I am. It starts taking over and making me believe that what someone said or did is reality, even when it’s not. When something negative is said about or done to me, that statement (or action) is on permanent record in my head and likes to play as a soundtrack throughout my day. For example…a not so nice person says something deragatory about me and for whatever reason, (it’s not like it useful or helpful!) a perfect mental picture is taken of those words and they are like a skipping record….that one or two lines repeats over and over and over. It’s pretty difficult to focus on doing right and good when that’s going on in your head.

At times, forgiveness is important to the offender. Most people care when they hurt others and oftentimes didn’t do it on purpose. But that’s not always the case. I’m amazed that there are some who thrive on inflicting pain and dealing with those kind is when (in my humble opinion) forgiveness is for the forgiver.

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I am not defined by the words or actions of others. No matter how hard they try to make it so, it’s not who I am. The only time it can change me is when I let it. What they did is their fault, but when I allow it to affect who I become, then I’m at fault. I have to forgive for myself. For my health, mental and physical, and here’s why. The definition of forgive, according to Merriam-Webster is this:

1. To give up resentment of or claim to requittal for

2. To cease to feel resentment against

So it really is for the forgiver…

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And this is where the above quote comes in as an essential key to the forgiveness puzzle, because it ain’t easy! More than once I’ve wondered, “Why can’t I just let it go?? I’ve tried and tried and tried, and it won’t go away!” But just the other day, God blessed me with this little tidbit….there’s no magic dust, no fix-it-all-fast pill. I have to let it go, Every Single Day. When those negative thoughts pop up, I give them to God and replace them with positive. And there are days that it’s a struggle, but as a whole it gets easier. I just have to keep fighting.